The Past and the Future
by TheseAngelWings
Summary: Alex Karev sees something that reminds him of his past, and helps him make up his mind about the future. Sorta angsty fluff, rated T for safety. One-shot


**A/N: My first GA fic, please review, review, review! Enjoy.**

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Dr. Alex Karev strides down the hallway, flipping quickly through some charts. He sets them down on a countertop, looking around for a nurse to put them back wherever they belong.

_I shouldn't have to do it; I'm paid to do surgery, not babysit patient files. _

Any such thoughts are driven out of his head as he sees two teenagers, a younger girl and an older boy, so alike that they must be siblings. They are standing in front of a bed with a woman in it, but they aren't looking at her. Instead, they are talking, so close to each other that, if they were the same height, they'd bump heads.

It's the expression on their faces that really catch his notice, though, a mixture of sadness, loneliness, and anger. It's an expression that shouldn't belong on anyone, especially not kids. The boy looks at least seventeen, but the worry lines on his face belong to a much older man.

He recognizes this scene, except it was different. The boy was him, and the girl was his sister, Amber. He finds himself drawn closer, listening, even though his common sense warning him not to get involved.

"Why won't you just talk to me? You leave me alone in the dark while you go and cope with whatever it is that you do. Every time, Jake, every time! I'm tired of it! Don't you know that I'm worried too, that I want to help as much as you do?" The girl is berating her brother, in a voice too mature for someone her age.

_She can't be more than fourteen, and she's already mature enough to say what she feels._

"Emma-"

"Don't you 'Emma' me!" The girl interrupts him. Her voice isn't so angry now, in fact, it's bordering on desperation. "I need you to stop pushing me away, Jake."

"Why do you always need _me, _why can't you just go and do whatever it is that stupid little girls do?" he hisses through his teeth. Already, the regret is visible on the boy's face.

"I'm sorry, Em, I didn't mean it. I'm just stressed right now, is all," he says, laying a hand on her shoulder. She brushes it off.

"Oh, you meant it. I know you meant it. You can't hide that from me," she says bitterly.

Karev wants to shout.

_No, don't! Tell her, that you can't bear for her to be growing up so fast, that all you want is for her to be an innocent little girl. Tell her that you can't hold it together if you realize that she's aware of what's happening, that she's mature enough to stop needing you._

Unconsciously, Karev drifts closer, till he's right outside the door. He's drawing stares from nurses now, but he doesn't care that much. In front of him, their debate is growing more heated.

"Why can't you grow up? Stop acting like a hormonal teen, and be mature!" They boy says, his voice raising the slightest bit.

"You mean how you matured? Taking care of us-" she gestures at the sleeping woman, "- and then locking yourself away? Keeping secrets and not telling anything? Jake, since you've matured, I barely know you!" The girl almost shouts.

Then it happens.

By reflex, the boy lifts his hand as if to deliver a backhand across her face.

_No, no, no._

She flinches back, then stares at him with the eyes of a person who has just realized that they can't trust anyone. Already, his hand is lowering, he's apologizing, but the damage is done. The girl pushes past him, and races out of the room.

The spell is broken, and Dr. Karev shakes his head, walking down the hallway to OR 3. It isn't his business, anyway.

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One short, successful surgery later, Karev walks down the hallway. As he passes a little niche in the wall, he hears the sound that every male hates: a crying girl. But when he looks back to see if it's someone he knows, it's the girl from earlier.

_Elizabeth, Emily… Emma. That was it._

Steeling himself, he walks slowly over to her.

Awkwardly, he says, "Hey. Um, are you alright?" She looks up slowly and shakes her head no.

_What else was I expecting? A bouncy girl, declaring that she was crying tears of joy?_

"Well… I'm a doctor." _Duh. _"I mean, maybe I could help?"

"It's just… My brother, he always pushes me away, even when I can help him. He does so much, it hurts me to see him having to take care of everything," she says haltingly. Karev nods encouragingly. "My dad, he isn't a good guy. I barely remember him. My mom's an addict, she's barely ever around and sober at the same time," she confesses softly. The tears have started slipping down her cheeks, first trickling, and then cascading.

"You know, your brother might not want you to have to deal with it, to grow up too fast. He might just be trying to protect you," Karev says uncomfortably.

"Well, I'm not a little girl anymore, no matter how hard he's trying." The girl says.

"Maybe he needs something to stay the same, you know, something to hold on to." She nods understandingly.

"I think you should go back to your brother, and talk. Don't blame, just have a conversation," he suggests. She nods again, and turns away. She looks back once.

"Thank you, Dr…" she looks at the lapel of his white coat, "Dr. Karev." She walks back to the room, and Karev can see through the window, the brother, an understanding smile on his face.

"You're welcome," he murmurs.

_Maybe Peds is the right place for me, after all._


End file.
